After SO Many Weeks...

It's been a very very long time since my last post. Well, I can see that I miss writing on this page.

I would like to share this one....

Don't Know Why...

Can I really change my surname in just a blink??? Well, if I can, I guess I already have done it... I'm so depressed lately to realize that my own relatives "DISOWN US". All these years,they still cannot accept the fact that we're already part of the B****L clan.

In my part, I really didn't care much about that issue, but it still hurts me. For me it's okay that they didn't recognize us as their relative but PLEASE don't say it in front of me or my family... It indeed disgrace us... But it humiliates YOU more...


hehehe...

The Thailand Effect 《preview of my Thai movie experience...》

lately, i been hooked up by thai love genre movies... I don’t know why I always watch them over and over again... especially those movies of “pchy” (witwisit hiranyowongkul). i’ll try to post a picture of him here in my blog... i guess, i’m so attracted to him. he’s too good-looking with a good voice. he is a member of a boy band in Thailand- the AUGUST band. i love their songs like “sunshine” & “gan lae gan”... i’ll share much about them on my next posts... Bye for now. take care...

Torn Between Two Lovers... ♥♥♥

I don't know why. It just came in my thoughts. How could I possibly love two guys, of the same range of feeling, at the same time. I guess, I'm just driven by my emotions lately.

Yes, I still love my first, though we're aren't together in reality but the feeling is there. I just assume whenever he's with me that there something between us though it's not true. You may just find me crazy having that kind of thinking but that's me. i cannot do something about it. Lately, we rarely see each other. At least I am able to contact him in his phone, but I wanted more than that. I badly wanted to see him every minute of the day... I know that's a selfish thing to do thinking that we're JUST FRIENDS (Ouch)

About the New guy in my heart, He's not that new after all. I never thought I'll fall for him. Who knows I'll be? It just blooms recently during the days I long for a companion, someone to talk to, someone I can play poker with (just to add color, hehehe05). I find his presence helpfully during the times I'm so down in my life. He's there to cheer me up. He's there unknowingly lifting my spirit to still live a life worth living. I still cannot see myself living a life without him beside me. There might be no strings attached between us but I can also feel the same love as I have give to my first.

Does my heart fails me for it cannot control his love that's why I ended up having two special love ones? Will I be forever torn between the two of them? I didn't one to hurt myself if I let go of someone and just find myself regretting of my decision. Though for both of them I don't have a commitment, but still I cannot force my heart to stop loving to any of them.

I guess I have to manage what I have by now. Just let myself weigh things so that I could decide what to do. I just wanted an exhaust of what I feel so that I will not be fill up with such things in me. This helps me a lot doing these things. Thank you. I love both of you, you know that. Nevertheless, I'll never let go of you without a valid reason...

♥-♥It's so hard to weigh things♥-♥

AMPALAYA (^^_)

Ampalaya (Bitter Melon) with a scientific name Momordica charantia, is a climbing vine and the tendrils of which grow up to 20 centimeters long.


Just a head start, I will not have a Science-O-Trivia in my page. It is just that I'm so pissed off today. I don't know why. I just used the plant ampalaya to describe everything that happen to my life this particular day.

There is this girl who indeed became successful in wrecking my whole day (hopefully just this day or else...). By the way she acts, duh it indeed make me feel sick. She sucks... She knows it from the first place. "She's ain't that beautiful after all" Don't I have the right to claim what's mine? Duh, if I can only kick your face in front of the crowd so that you'll ever realize everything.. You're just a nobody in the picture.. Don't act as if you own them...


EEEEh... Why do I ever wasted a space on my journal for your stupidity.. You're just a home wrecker... I should never waste my time and effort for you...

...GoodBye, HellGirl...

HIGH SCHOOL NEVER ENDS - Bowling Soup

HEY!
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
HEY!
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
HEY!

4 Years you think for sure
That's all you've got to endure
All the (total d**ks)
All the Stuck-up Chicks
So superficial, so immature

Then When you Graduate,
Ya take a look around and you say "Hey Wait!"
This is the same as where I just came from,
I thought it was over, Aw that's just great.

The Whole Damn World is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and (who's having s*x)
Who‘s got the money. Who (gets the honeys)
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess

And you still don't have the right look
And you don't have the right friends
Nothing changes but the faces, the names, and the trends

High School Never Ends
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
HEY!
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
HEY!

Check out the popular kids
You'll never guess what Jessica did!
And how did Mary Kate (lose all that weight?)
And (Katie had a baby so I guess Tom's straight!)

And the only thing that matters,
Is climbing up that social ladder
Still care about your hair and the car you drive
Doesn't matter if you're 16 or 35

Reese Witherspoon, she's the Prom Queen
Bill Gates, Captain of the chess team
Jack Black, the clown
Brad Pitt, the quarterback

Seen it all before
I want my money back!

The Whole (damn) World is just as obsessed
With who's the best dressed and (who's having sex)
Who's (in the club and who's on the drugs)
(And who's throwin up before they digest)

And you still don't have the right look
And you don't have the right friends
(And you still listen to the same sh*t you did back then)

High School Never Ends
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
High School Never Ends

The Whole Damn World is just as obsessed
With who‘s the best dressed and (who's having s*x)
Who‘s got the money. Who (gets the honeys)
Who‘s kinda cute and who‘s just a mess

And I still don't have the right look
And I still have the same 3 friends
And I'm pretty much - the same as - I was back then(hold en)

High School Never Ends
Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
High School Never Ends

Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
High School Never Ends

Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh
Here We Go Again

Oh Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh, Oh Oh Oh-Oh


- this song I dedicate to my high school bestfriends...

V-Club.... \m/

What Matter's Most....

Friendship, makes everything perfect. Since we're all imperfect here in this world of matter.

I Just Don't Know... (To My BamBam) (^_^)

I don't know why every time I look at you it is like I always fall for you. Yes, I know you're not as handsome as my past but your personality has a very big impact to me. My friends always say that, I'm just waiting time and effort when I try to be with you but for me it is the happiest moments I'll treasure until the day my love for you fades. I guess, I have to make the most out of it whenever you're at my side... I know you already knew that I'm madly, deeply in-love with you BamBam, and I also know that there's no way that the two of us can be together yet, I'm still hoping for a chance.

Compared to the other guys that I fall for during my college years, you are the person who indeed I will never forget even when we separate ways already. I'm not yet ready to face reality that I will no longer going to see you... I Love You So So Much, BamBam. If only you could read this message. If I can only say these words in front of you. If you will no longer think that my admiration for you is not anymore a joke...

I'm already happy just looking at you everyday. It always leave a smile in my face seeing you so happy with your life. Maybe that's what they are referring to that if you indeed love a person, you're going to love him even you know there's no return of investment that will happen...

I guess I've said much. Just remember I'll always be here for you. Even we can't be as lovers, at least as a friend I can make you happy. Take care always... I Love you My baby... My BamBam.... My hehehe05.... My (^_^). LoveLots...

...My Baby, My BamBam...

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

It's Almost End of the School Year....

Haist. Graduation, Summer Vacation, what more a can I ask for??? I am still bombarded with so many stuffs to do before this semester ends. Just thinking graduation is only three weeks from now makes me feel sad and lonely. Though I'm not going to graduate yet, however, there will be two months of sadness in my part since I'm not going to see some of my friends and colleagues. I'm going to miss you guys... My groupie.. Just keep in touch... Just message me if we had something to do.. hehehe05...

♥♥♥I'mgoingtomisseverybodyespeciallyMyBAMBAM...♥♥♥
...Muahuggs.Lovelots.BeHappy...